Top 10 April 2008 News Wrap-up
Well fine, 9. I started late.
(9) UK Cartoon characters created to warn children as young as 5 about the dangers of online pedophiles; bemused 5 year old girl wonders why her offline mother/father/aunt/uncle/etc is licking her wee-wee.
(8) New special deal in uncivilized America: Buy a new car, get a free gun! Drive by shooting incidents reach unprecedented levels.
(7) Eurovision may go to Africa and the Middle East. Greatest thing since sliced Sudoku, “Clickity-Click-Click KA-BOOM!” songs to take/destroy the world by storm.
(6) Chinese soldiers are robots.
(5) China finally unblocks the BBC website after 18 years. Amnesty International, Human Rights Watch, Reporters Without Borders, Wikileaks, etc still on the waiting list.
(4) 111 countries agree to ban cluster bombs. The only countries that HAVE cluster bombs (United States, Russia, China, India, Israel and Pakistan) absent from meeting and thus, not part of agreement. Net effect = shit-fucking-all.
(3) Burma/Myanmar suffers devastating cyclone. When asked about the situation 1 month later, media/public/average joe responds: “Duurrr… Burma? What’s that? Is that edible? ‘Cause it sure sounds tasty!”
(2) Josef Fritzl, Australian, basement-dungeon, rapist pedophile has incest sex with his daughter. Then makes babies with his daughter. Then has incest sex with his daughter’s children (his grandchildren). Crikey!
(1) Chinese quake death toll expected to be over 80,000. Sweet sweet justice! (No punchline here, folks!)
Did I miss anything? Any other news and events worthy of submission?
Then leave a comment below.
June 1st, 2008 at 7:49 pm
EAT SHIT AND DIE
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September 9th, 2008 at 4:31 pm
THIS peerson is Austrian! NOT Australian…
September 14th, 2008 at 9:24 am
Anonymous Says:
September 9th, 2008 at 4:31 pm
THIS peerson is Austrian! NOT Australian…
Where do you get your news from? Josef Fritzl is most definitely Australian.
September 22nd, 2008 at 11:20 am
Josef is Austrian.
October 4th, 2008 at 1:59 pm
Wow you are a fucking retard. Maybe you can try re-reading your news articles. Josef Fritzl is AUSTRIAN. Hence the link YOU’VE posted has the word AUSTRIA opposed to AUSTRALIA in the URL.
Cunt
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